New mindset.

Chris and I were chatting with my in-laws last night.  We were talking about my creed and my father-in-law asked me 'do you consider yourself a Cancer patient?'  It got me thinking, I do, but only in 1 location, the doctors office.  Outside of that, I don't consider myself a 'patient,' I'm still the same Lauren/Lolo/LY, I just happen to be living with Cancer.  So, in thinking about this, I thought it made sense to then adjust my creed.  Throughout this process (exactly 6 weeks from diagnosis), I have learned a wealth of information, a lot of it shocking, but also a lot of it hugely impactful not only to my health, but how I approach things in life as well.  I also know that my learnings are not over and that this small blip of my life will be a part of me forever, continuing to learn and adapt as I go about my life.

When I wrote my creed, I was in the early stages of diagnosis (6 weeks is still early, but I've done 1 round of chemotherapy and my mindset changes daily), so at the time this was how I was feeling.  I am no expert with 1 round of chemotherapy under my belt, but I am learning and evolving and for that, I need to evolve my creed.  So, the answer to the original question 'do you consider yourself a Cancer patient,' my answer is, 90% of the time, NO.

The word patient does not define me, cancer does not define me - I am still Lauren, a caring, thoughtful, planner, baking loving, family loving, food and wine loving girl that just wants to continue to enjoy life with my favorite person in the world (my husband) and all of my family and friends.  I will live with Cancer for the time being (and I will one day live Cancer free) but I can not let it define me and be the opening to my creed throughout this journey.  So, with that, I have rephrased it slightly.  The key differences I have put in bold.

I am a woman, a wife, a daughter, a granddaughter, a sister, an aunt, a friend, a niece, a cousin, a boss.

I am a warrior and a member of multiple teams: marriage, family and work.

I serve myself, my husband, my family, my friends and all those I encounter.

I will always place the mission first.

I will never accept defeat.

I will never quit.

I will never let my strength go.

I am disciplined, physically and mentally tough, willing to learn and adapt for whatever comes my way.

I will always maintain my pride, trusting the process, the doctors and myself.

I am hopeful, strong and confident.

I stand ready to fight, accept change and destroy the cancer cells in my body.

I am the guardian of my life and my husband, family and friends are here to walk alongside me and lift me up, both physically and mentally.

I am a woman, a wife, a daughter, a granddaughter, a sister, an aunt, a friend, a niece, a cousin, a boss.

And lastly, just an update for this week.  I am feeling really good, basically like myself.  I've been able to workout with our trainer (not as strenuous, of course), take more calls, enjoy some cooking (and baking this weekend) and get out for lunch w/ my parents, dinner at my in-laws (with lots of kitty and doggy play time in between), all the while doing everything for ME.  I know next week will be another week of feeling blah (tired, finding foods to curb nausea and just focusing on my health), but I'll take the good days and enjoy them until the next round begins.  Monday is treatment 2, which means I will be 1/8th done with Phase 1 of my Breast Cancer journey - sounds small, but each step is a step forward and for that I am grateful.  Hope everyone enjoys the weekend, I'll be spending it with my Dad and husband 🥰.

All my love,

Lauren