Save the Date - October 22, Cancer Walk

 OCTOBER 22, SAVE THE DATE!  

American Cancer Society Breast Cancer Walk in Orange County, CA

 

Last year was extra special, we couldn’t stop smiling (inside & out) as we were surrounded by all our family and friends while Lauren sat in a wheelchair and was pushed around. Lauren felt so weak and sick, but the smile made all those things feel small for that short period of time – she was done with chemo, getting close to her double mastectomy and had entered a new phase in our cancer story.

 

This year we meet again and we are so excited for October 22.  First, Lauren gets to walk this year!!! Second, it makes us smile knowing that we did it and we are on the other side and can help other people as they embark on this horrible disease. Third, we get to see all our family & friends; to have everyone around us during this day makes it extra special.  

 

So, if you can, please join us again this year (and all the years to come) as we walk the American Cancer Society’s Breast Cancer walk to raise critical funds for breast cancer research.  Details to come in September.  For now, if you’d like to donate, please donate to Lauren’s page, here.  

 

We hope to see you there!

 

XO,

Chris & Lauren

Breast Cancer Walk 2022

August 2023 Update

It’s finally Summer in California!  This Summer is way better than last Summer, that’s for sure.  

 

June was busy with birthdays, Chris’s included, our friend’s wedding in Oak Glenn, a trip to Boise to visit my dad and Lynn for Father’s Day, and Chris had a nightmarish beginning trip to Denver for work for a few days, but ended well.

Paco (left), Vitaly (middle) aka “Vito” 🤣

July was spent with our most perfect trip to our favorite place, Maui!  We have waited 2 years for this trip.  Had amazing meals, got massages, met new friends, laid by the pool in a cabana each day, shopped and literally did nothing.  We never even made it down to the beach – which was fine considering we’ve been to Maui probably about 10 times.  It’s the most magical place, as soon as we step off the plane we are relaxed and ready for paradise.  Overall, life finally starting to feel normal again. 

 

Healthwise, I feel great! 

 

-       My weight is normalizing.  I still have some GI issues, chemo really wreaked havoc on my GI tract and colon.  

-       I see Dr. Vandermolen monthly and he continues to tell us things are great.  My tumor marker continues to fall every time we see him.  

-       We saw a Gynecological Oncologist the other week, Dr. Abaid.  She will do a full hysterectomy to remove my ovaries, uterus and fallopian tubes in December.  This will be the last of any surgeries I have to prevent cancer; once that is over, I have reduced any risk of Breast Cancer or Ovarian Cancer to a very low minimum. It feels good to wrap things up.  The doctors told me I should do it before I turned 45, but as I’ve said before, cancer doesn’t know your age and Chris and I know for a fact we do not want children, so rather get it done sooner vs later – I don’t want anything lingering.  

-       I’ve been going to physical therapy weekly for my left arm, which is where the 2 lymph nodes were removed.  It’s probably going to be a 18-24 month process to get my arm in a place where I can fully extend it above my head, but it’s ok – it’s more like massage therapy than physical therapy, which feels nice and I’ve already seen progress.  Before starting I was at about a 45 degree angle, now I’m close to 60-65 degrees, so definitely progress being made.

-       My hair is growing and is just wild – it’s like Bozo the Clown when I don’t put a headband on or try to tame it.  I’m going in 2 weeks to get it trimmed so it’s more of a ‘style’ because it’s just getting out of hand.  It’s weird to think about getting a haircut when all I want is for my hair to grow, but I also need to look somewhat presentable!  The last time I had a haircut was when I cut my hair before chemotherapy began.  

 

I should be having a PET Scan in September or October.  It’s scary to think about, but I’m using my tools to not worry about the things that haven’t happened.  I’ll have PET Scans for the rest of my life, but I’m sure these first few for the next few years are always going to be scary since they say that IF your cancer is going to come back it’s within the first 5 years.  Will be sure to keep everyone posted there.  

 

Overall, just really happy!  Enjoying Summer, our house, baking and cooking again, working out and lots of walks.  Not a day goes by right now where I don’t think back to the struggles of last year, but the feelings I have today are pure pride, joy, happiness and love.  Forever grateful to be past the hard parts and to be alive.

 

------

One last thing to share.  During treatment and surgeries, I kept quotes up around the house, reminding me to be strong and brave and that treatment was only temporary.  I’d look at them often to remind myself that I’d get my life back.  I also had my creed pasted on my closet and would read it to myself everyday – words are my love language and I needed those (amongst so many other things) to keep me going.

 

At the end of March, after everything was done and I was about 2 weeks post reconstructive surgery, I figured it was time to take everything down – to move past those words that got me through tough days and to build my next chapter.  

 

It was important to me to continue with my creed but re-phrase the words that got me through chemo and surgeries, I needed to redefine how I was going to live my life as a cancer survivor.  So, with that, my new creed now happily lives framed in my closet and I look at it often and am amazed at what I got through.

 

--

 

I am a woman, a wife, a daughter, a grand-daughter, a sister, an aunt, a friend, a niece, a cousin, a boss.

 

I am a warrior and member of multiple teams.

 

I serve myself, my husband, my family, my friends and all those I encounter.

 

I will always place the mission first.

 

I will never accept defeat.

 

I will never quit.

 

I will never let my strength go.

 

I am disciplined, physically and mentally tough, willing to learn and adapt to anything I encounter.

 

I will always maintain my gratitude and love for life.

 

I am a strong, proud cancer survivor.

 

I stand ready to fight off fear, uncertainty and anxiety for whatever comes my way.

 

I am the guardian of my life, and my husband, family and friends are here to cherish life with me.

 

I am a woman, a wife, a daughter, a grand-daughter, a sister, an aunt, a friend, a niece, a cousin, a boss.

 

 

May 24, 2023 Update

May 24, 2023

Status update – doing great!

 

The past 6 weeks has been busy for Chris and I, but full of so much life.  We’ve been able to spend time with each other and our families and friends.  Adventuring to new restaurants, small trips to celebrate my birthday and attend REVOLVEfestival last month, enjoying bike rides and lots of walks.  Updates get harder to talk about as we get further away from surgeries, treatments, doctors visits which is all great, it’s also weird to not still provide progress in regards to how things are going as we still want to share the entire process, over years, for whoever may be in our shoes in the future.

 

So with that, here are some health updates:

1.     I’m recovering well from my reconstructive surgery.  I saw Dr. Ng on Tuesday for a 2 month post op visit.  She said I am healing nicely and that I won’t need to see her again until 1 year post surgery!  Not going to the doctor is great but also still a little weird for me.  I’m happy I am not going to doctors appointments multiple times a week but in the back of my head I also want to go on a regular cadence to make sure everything is all good – it’s a little bit of a mind fuck to be honest and will take time to recognize it’s all good and it continues to mean I’m healing.  Dr. Ng suggested that I get physical therapy, which is really what I was hoping for.  The arm extension in my left arm/shoulder has been a struggle.  The right arm can fully extend to the sky, but the left arm gets to about a 45 degree angle.  Prior to reconstructive surgery my left arm was at about an 80 degree angle and I had worked really hard to get it back to that place post mastectomy.  The reconstructive surgery has pushed me back and its not recovering as quickly as it should considering reconstructive surgery was much easier.  So I’ll start physical therapy as soon as I can.  The one thing that came out of my visit with Dr. Ng is that I should really avoid laying on my stomach and in particular should avoid pressure being applied to my chest.  So, I asked…can I ever get a massage….the answer is, no, not unless I’m sitting up.  Basically the skin between my implants and my chest is so thin (because they removed all breast tissue) that there is concern that blood could not flow properly and that I could injure myself creating internal problems.  So, with that said, I’ll need to be cautious with pressure on my chest for the rest of my life – which is totally ok just a bummer that I won’t be able to fall asleep to a relaxing massage!  The future of my appointments with Dr. Ng will involve annual check ups but additionally they will do yearly MRI’s to ensure everything internally is still aligned.

2.     I saw Dr. Vandermolen earlier this month. He checked my blood work as they do each month and for the first time since before treatment, my numbers were within range!  This was a win for me – I had been monitoring my white blood count and red blood count a lot since treatment ended and it fluctuated so much each month that prior to surgeries I was very cautious (per doctors orders) to stay clear of anyone who was sick.   Granted my numbers could shift again, but we take the wins and continue to hold onto them.  The best part of the visit was that Dr. Vandermolen looked at Chris and told him, I’m doing great!  It made us both smile and to get his confirmation just puts our minds at ease.  Dr. Vandermolen is our guiding light, we trust him with my life.

3.     I’ve had some colon issues the past 6 weeks or so.  Started to work with our PCP to get some blood work and stool testing done.  The testing all came back normal with some weird nuances – will explain in a bit.  So next steps were to reach out to Dr. Quist, my GI doctor, to determine what else we could do.  He scheduled me for a colonoscopy – if you haven’t had one, wowzers – 24 pills and 128oz of water over the course of 8 hours sure does add up!  And then of course the aftermath of all of that is super fun – we’ll just say I spent a lot of time in the bathroom that day.  Dr. Quist conducted the colonoscopy and immediately told us there were no polyps or cancer – we assumed this would be the news, but of course it was still nice to hear.  A week or so later we were given the biopsy results from the colonoscopy – again, all clear!  So, what the heck is going on – we still don’t know.  But as I mentioned, some of the testing I had done with our PCP added some additional context, but still leaves some continued monitoring.  

a.     One of the tests was a food allergy test.  The results are graded 1-5 with 5 being the highest level of allergy – all of my scores were 4-5, so basically it concluded that I am allergic to everything, and the results said I should be on a strict diet of….1 coffee bean, 1 green bean and 4oz of chicken / day.  Well, this is definitely not sustainable, so the conclusion is to monitor my foods (I’ve started a daily food log) to see what causes any issues, keep eating how I have been and check again in 6 months.  The interesting thing is that our PCP spoke to a specialist from the lab and they mentioned that 1) the case of someone being allergic in the grades of 4-5 is very rare, he’s seen it happen to about 10 – 15 people.  But, 2) he also said that chemotherapy and immunotherapy could have disrupted my gut so much that it’s causing a false read, hence the reason they want to check again in a few months.  

4.     Menopause.  Prior to treatment Dr. Vandermolen asked us if we wanted to freeze any eggs because chemotherapy would put me into peri-menopause.  Considering Chris and I didn’t want to have kids, we were comfortable with the outcome (and honestly were happy that this solidified the fact that we wouldn’t be having kids)!  Over the course of treatment and even to today, I’ve continued to have hot flashes and have not had a period.  I was curious if I was still in the peri-menopause phase and if I’d ever get a period again.  So, I had our PCP do some hormone testing.  It concluded that I am actually in post-menopause!  So, I basically went through peri-menopause and menopause in a year and am now post-menopausal with hot flashes and no additional side effects.  Granted I’ll be in post-menopause for the rest of my life and still could experience the side effects of menopause, but my body basically went through a ~10 year process in one year – pretty wild.  

 

All in all those are the updates for now.  Continuing to see Dr. Vandermolen monthly for blood work and check ups and will have my next PET Scan in Fall, a GI post feeding tube removal in July and a follow up with Dr. Guerra, one year post mastectomy in November.  The monitoring is in full effect and we will gladly take it!!  

All our best and lots of love, Chris & Lauren

 

April 7, 2023 - One Year Later

April 7 (10:51am to be exact), marks one year from my diagnosis.  

I’ve been pretty emotional the past week or so as today was fast approaching.  It’s been an overwhelming feeling of gratitude and pride, but on the flip side the fears and anxiety of the day of my diagnosis are resurfacing and I’m reminded of how scared we were. I think back to that day and hate that the first thing that came to my mind when the Radiologist told me I had cancer was that I wouldn’t make it to the holidays or my next birthday, my mind went to the worst possible scenario when we heard the news.  Now I know, I am stronger than I ever thought I was and so much braver than I ever wished to be and what is even more impactful, is that my husband, family and friends were right beside me the entire way.

 

As we look back at the past few years (beyond just 2022) we recognize that we’ve had some really tough years. When you search for the hardest things in life, you’ll find 5 events.  A serious illness, death of a loved one, moving, losing a job, and divorce.  Hitting 3 of the 5 hardest things in life in the span of 4 years really added up.  To take it back a bit as we continue to embrace 2023, here goes what started the lead up to 2022.

 

It began in 2019 when we sold our first home in Buena Park and bought a home in Seal Beach…hit our first hard life event, moving.  We love our house in Seal Beach, but buying/selling a home at the same time is stressful and moving is just the pits.  About 2 weeks into moving to Seal Beach my grandpa passed away, he was truly one of the best guys we had the opportunity to know and be loved by….we hit our second hard life event…death of a loved one. We talk about him often and I talked to him every night while going through chemo asking him to take care of me and our family.  Then COVID (most people’s first pandemic) hit in 2020 and it changed the world and how not only we did things but how we all had to adapt (side note, shouldn’t this be a hard life event?!).  2021 rolls around and we begin construction on our house.  This adventure was supposed to take 4 months and ended up taking 8 months, again moving twice in that 8 month span since we had to move out for construction.  Hard life event…moving, yet again.  We lived at Chris’s Uncles rental house during this time and we were able to spend so much time with him that it made a temporary home fun.  After settling into our house, one month post construction - March 5, 2022 we moved back home, BAM, we are told I had Stage 2 Breast Cancer.  Treatments, scans, surgeries, and doctors’ appointments started to pile up. Third life event, a serious illness.  All 3 events came at us in what feels like multiple slaps in the face in a short amount of time, despite it being over the course of 4 years.  We had no break. Not that any of this contributed to my cancer (since I am a BRACA carrier it was highly likely for me to be diagnosed), but 2022 was supposed to be our year to go on more vacations, get out in the world again, celebrate our 10 year wedding anniversary, Chris’s 40^th birthday and really enjoy our newly remodeled home.  It was taken away from us for yet another year.  As we look back on the past 4 years there were a lot of really high highs but even bigger lows.  Through it all, we would change nothing about the past 4 years. Granted we’d want my grandpa to be alive, but we often talk about how worried he would have been to experience COVID and my cancer diagnosis. 2021/early 2022 brought us a home that we love and makes us feel calm and comforted.  

 

Fast forward to April 2022 and the remainder of the year that brought us so much pain and towards the end, pure gratitude for the end result.  The doctors, the medicine and research, the nurses, our family and friends – all contributed to curing me of cancer.  We think back and we would not have changed a thing about 2022 and how we approached our journey. We would have liked things to have been smoother towards the end, but there was nothing we could do about it, we weren’t in control.  We know we fought, and we fought REALLY hard. And as we share our story and meet new people, we find comfort in talking to those that have walked in our shoes, it has helped to heal our minds and heart and feel understood.

 

Today will always be a day that we celebrate going forward.  Celebrate the challenges we overcame, the lessons we learned and the life that we get to live.  Cheers to us, to life, to health, to happiness and to you.  

 

All our love, Chris & Lauren

Long overdue update - 3/16/2023

March 16, 2023 

How is it already March?!  Time is flying by, for the first time since last April.  We have been doing really good!  Life is starting to get back to normal but with a totally different outlook on how we live and approach things.  

 

Happenings since the last post.  Overall, we’ve been able to go out for dinner dates, enjoy dinners with family and I’ve been able to get back to training, which is loosely paused for the next week or so since I had my reconstructive surgery.  But, here is what we missed sharing since end of January.

 

February 3: I was invited to be our niece, Livie’s special person at school.  Not only was this a highlight for her, but it melted my heart and made me so proud that 1) I could be there for her and 2) that I was at a point in this journey where I could do something on my own and it didn’t involve a doctors visit or surgery.  Plus, it was fun to get her out of school early and take her on a shopping spree at Target and to meet Chris for lunch.

 

February 7: My gtube (feeding tube) was finally removed!  This was a huge win.  To see how far I had come in a 3 month period (from when it was first placed – 11/3/22) made us ecstatic.  Talk about a super unattractive/annoying piece of equipment, but it opened up not only my options for food, but our ability to go out to dinner for the first time since April 2022.  I was grateful that I had that dang tube because it literally saved my life towards the end of treatment and while I was recovering.

 

February 12 & 13: Our first night out of the house in well over a year.  We stayed at the Montage for the night and were spoiled by the hotel.  They upgraded our room to a suite, comped our bar bill, sent us so many things to our room – it was a really special night to see that our journey was allowing us to enjoy life again.  What was really cool about this getaway was that we sat at the bar and the bartender asked us what we were celebrating, we told him it was our first getaway since diagnosis.  He said he had a bout with cancer 7 years ago and never did we think we’d be in this so called ‘club,’ but its become heartwarming to hear over the past year other people’s stories and what they went through and they’ve all gotten to the other side.  

 

February 17: My port came out – HUGE in my mind to get this removed.  The port was again, not the most attractive piece of equipment and I hated feeling it when I showered or rubbed my neck.  But it served me well during treatment and I am so grateful it was there because getting poked in the arms weekly, sometimes 4-5 times a week would have been even harder on my system.  Everything went through that port (chemo meds, blood draws, hydration, blood transfusions) – it truly was the reminder of all the things that went into my body and as appreciative as I am that chemo saved my life, it was nice to bid it farewell.  

 

February 22: I had my first PET/CT Scan since I was diagnosed.  I’ll have these for the rest of my life, the cadence of them I’m not so sure of and I honestly don’t ask because I don’t want to anticipate these and build up my anxiety when my focus is just living each day and not worrying about things that haven’t happened yet – thanks to my therapist for teaching me this essential skill!  

 

March 6: The results of the PET Scan were shared with us and they were NEGATIVE/clear!!  First of many, we take the good news and hold onto it.  Dr. Vandermolen also checked my tumor marker (part of blood draws that I get monthly) and he was pleased how much it had normalized from the previous month, so March 6 was a celebration for us with much needed champagne!

 

March 13: The final push of all – my reconstructive surgery!!  The surgery went very well.  Dr. Ng was happy with my recovery from my mastectomy and was able to get through the surgery smoothly.  I feel good post surgery, am sore from where the incisions are and have to be mindful with how I move for the next few weeks, but this is much easier than the mastectomy and at this point we already know the routine and what we need to do.  I’ve talked to people who had breast surgeries and they’ve told me it’s uncomfortable and painful, but the great thing for me is that I have no nerves or feeling in my chest so the pain is really manageable and no Tylenol has been needed!

 

All in all, we are coming up to almost a year since my diagnosis.  April 7, 2022 at 10:51am, this date and time will forever be engrained in our minds.  We look back and are thrilled that we get to close this chapter.  We won’t forget the pain, fear, anxiety that we went through, but we will hold onto our strength, hope and love that helped us to survive.  On April 7, if you think of us, smile and know that although this journey will never be over for us, know that we’ve gotten through the toughest experience that we’ve ever been through, stronger and better than ever.  

 

So what’s next for us?  We will continue to keep this little blog of ours updated as things happen.  As we’ve said since day one this is something that will now be a part of our life forever and we set out wanting to share what happens during the initial steps to cure Lauren’s cancer (as we’ve done) and now to remain cancer free.

January 26, 2023 Update

1.26.2023

 

Hi All,

 

It’s been a few weeks since we updated the blog – to be honest, it’s been pretty mellow, but there have been some good learnings and great progress!

 

Our life has really started to feel like normal again, which makes us both more relaxed and happier!  I’m able to drive, do laundry, clean the house, do the dishes and most importantly cook meals again!  I didn’t drive during treatments and after surgery, for obvious reasons – I was tired, couldn’t move my arms, queasy, etc, etc. Doing stuff around the house was just exhausting for me and after surgery I wasn’t able to lift anything so everything over the past 8 months was done by my wonderful husband.  Cooking again has been so nice for the both of us, I have an appetite, love cooking and playing in the kitchen so it feels wonderful to be able to do the things I love again and Chris eats more than just rice or a grilled cheese now.  I have worked hard on walking so I’m getting in close to 2 miles a day (I did 4 miles a day and strength training before I was diagnosed), so I’ve been working on getting back to where I was.  I’m proud of myself every time I’ve been able to pass my goals…started with 0.5 miles each day for a week, built up to a mile, and so on – increasing my time each week too.  It sounds so simple, but the first week I was winded.  Even doing 12 squats a day right now puts me out of breath, I have a long way to go, but it feels good to challenge myself again.  

 

I started back at work last week after being off for 2 months – it felt like my first day of school where I got to see all my friends again.  I didn’t realize how much I missed it until I was back.  Chemo brain was such a thing during treatments, I could feel myself having a hard time focusing or would get so tired throughout the day; it feels wonderful to be back at it and contributing and using my mind again, it’s like riding a bike!

 

I can’t even put to words how amazing it is to feel like yourself again.  Treatments were really really fucking hard (excuse my French) and I remember people telling me that I wouldn’t feel like myself again until 3 months after treatment was over, which while you are going through it, time goes soooo slowly.  It was like clockwork though, I finished treatment September 26…December 17 I went cold turkey on my feeding tube and took control of how I was feeling, started walking, cooking, eating, doing things for ME and not letting the past 8 months control my life anymore.  Life is good, I’m alive, cancer free, I appreciate everything and take nothing for granted.  Chris and I play games some nights and I cherish those nights; we go on Jeep rides, and I still smile when the fresh air hits my face, I go on walks with family – I look forward to continuing to cherish the simple things in life.

 

In terms of doctor’s updates.  Here is what has been happening:

·      I’ve seen the breast surgeon, she’s happy with my progress!  I need to work on my arm movement before I go into reconstructive surgery, which is scheduled for March 13.  My right arm I can pretty much lift over my head completely, but my left arm only goes up about half way (it feels like a rubber band pulling) so I have exercises that I have to do a few times a day to get my mobility to a better place.  The fun thing about it was that Chris would wash my hair because I had a hard time lifting my arms up to do so.  We find laughter in it as we spike my hair in funny ways and take pictures of it.  I have been able to wash my hair in the sink now, which feels good and rewarding.  Going forward, I don’t have to see her for another 6 months but she will be someone I see every 6 months for the next 5 years to monitor everything.  This is a relief considering I was seeing a doctor at least once a week for months, I’ll take the separation where I can get it!

·      My plastic surgeon is very pleased with how well the hyperbaric chamber worked for my body.  I’ll see her again for a preop appointment and then go into surgery, of course with restrictions to movement again.  She has told me that this surgery is much easier since my skin has been stretched from the expanders I have in my chest.

·      The GI doctor gave me the go ahead to eat pretty much what I want.  However, I can’t eat pork (bummer because I’d love a bacon/pepperoni pizza!), steak/tough meats, spicy foods, onions and garlic.  I have to still be cautious with acidic foods as well.  But, I’m eating constantly and just trying to gain weight since I lost 25+ pounds, a lot of that being muscle too!  I get the feeding tube removed on February 7, I cannot explain how excited I am to get this darn thing out – it pulls on my stomach, is a pain to deal with because it dangles so low (I have to be careful I don’t accidentally get it in the toilet when I use the bathroom – haha!) and I have to clean it daily so there is no infection.  It’s also very challenging to wear jeans so I wear sweats and leggings every day because the tube rubs on jeans and is uncomfortable when I sit.  Plus, the plan is that once this comes out, I can eat everything I want and Chris and I can finally go out to dinner, it’s been since April 2022 that we’ve gone on a date, so we are both anxiously awaiting a night out!  Additionally, I can drink wine again!  I can only have 1-2 small glasses a week, but I’ll take it and enjoy it because I haven’t had wine since Chris’s birthday (June 4^th).

·      The oncologist (my guiding light, Dr. Vandermolen) is happy with how I’ve been doing that now I only see him monthly vs weekly!  We had a little bit of a scare about a week ago.  They draw my blood every time I go and check my white blood count, red blood count, liver and a bunch of other things.  My red blood count has been trending down for the past 2 months, on top of that I had a few days where my ankles would start to swell.  Dr. Vandermolen checked my iron, he wanted to make sure I wasn’t anemic.  All was good there and the nurse called to tell me it was good, but she brought up that my tumor marker and liver enzymes were a bit off.  The tumor marker basically measures the cancer cells in your body to see if they grow or not.  Mine were a little elevated so they wanted me to draw blood again but reassured me that these numbers can fluctuate regularly and that this was just a double check.  We patiently waited 4 days to hear that my tumor marker and liver enzyme had normalized again – phew!!  We knew that this was normal, but it still is always going to be in the back of our minds and is scary.  

 

Those are all the updates for now, lots of really great progress made and we are moving in the right direction.  Most importantly, as I’ve said before and wrote about as a life lesson, we are HAPPY!  Thank you again for everyone’s love and support through all of this, we are so very grateful.

 

We’ll continue to keep you updated and share along the way.  We are going to start working on turning our little blog posts into a book, we want to continue to share our story and find ways to impact and give hope to those going through this, whether it’s the individual or someone they are close to.  Will take some time, but we’ve opened up our once very private lives and shared our story.

 

All the best and lots of love,

Lauren

 

 

12-21-2022 Update

Hi All,

Happy Holidays!

 

Things here have been good. I’ve been healing well from surgery. I am still not allowed to lift my arms or carry anything; not sure how much longer that will be but the expanders in my chest are sewn in so I imagine at this point it won’t be until my next surgery, when they do the reconstructive portion. The surgeon has started to ‘expand’ the bags in my chest. It’s a fairly simple process and she injects saline into them little at a time. I feel nothing since all the nerves are gone which is bizarre but good because I don’t want to feel needles going into my chest. She’s been really pleased with my progress.

 

The hyperbaric has been treating me well, the doctor signed me up for an additional 10 rounds and I’ll be done with it next week. It’s quite relaxing once I’m in the chamber, just sitting and watching a movie, but I am getting over the daily task of going and not being able to do the things I want to do, like getting my life back on track.  But, I’m glad it’s working, my nipples are healing nicely and it seems like removal won’t be necessary. 

 

Feeding tube was going well until I decided Saturday that I was over it and I’ve gone cold turkey on it. I eat apple sauce, banana baby food, smoothies, juices, pasta, and a few other things by mouth. I had a 2nd endoscopy last Tuesday and the doctor was pleased with how things looked, he said the inflammation and ulcers were looking much better. The biggest change is that my duodenum has started to swell a little so that’s another thing that w

ill take time to heal. The duodenum is what connects the stomach to the small intestine. The feeding tube won’t come out until February or March and that’s when the next endoscopy will be done to see how everything has healed.  It’s kind of a pain to have a feeding tube, it hangs from right by my belly button and just gets in the way of everything, I can’t wait until it’s gone.

 

Overall, lots of progress made and I’m feeling really good.  Been able to get out for walks, eating feels good and have been slowly trying to get my strength back.  

 

I can’t wait until 2023 comes, 2022 really was the worst year for us.  We’ve had years that were challenging and things happened, but this year far surpasses anything we’ve dealt with.  I had no clue going into this how challenging it would really be.  You imagine tough, but going through it was beyond that.  I don’t even know how to describe it, but can tell you it challenged us physically, mentally, and emotionally…but, I am reminded (thanks to Chris) that every outcome throughout this journey has been positive and I will cherish that.  Farewell 2022, I will unfortunately remember you but will never allow you to control my life.  

 

Happy Holidays, may 2023 be a wonderful year!

Lauren

Aaaaaaaaaannnndddddd, we're back!

Hello everyone. 

It has been a hell of a ride for the past few weeks, so much so, that we just did not have the time or mental capacity to keep the blog updated with everything that has happened.  This is a long one, so sit back, and enjoy the ride.

 

Trying to think back to October 19 to our last blog post, there was a major revelation to one of the causes of Lauren vomiting multiple times in a day, sometimes up to 6 times, but at least 2 daily.  As last mentioned, Dr. Vandermolen requested an endoscopy to be performed.  What was revealed was that Lauren’s stomach and esophagus was covered in ulcers from the chemo medicine, but also possibly stress induced.  Immediately, Lauren’s diet changed to mashed potatoes, yogurt, and miso soup.  Even so, we knew it was only a matter of time before it would come back up.  Everything that went down, just would not stay down and it was causing a huge concern with all the nurses and the doctors, and even family.  We all could see the agony and the pain Lauren was going through not keeping any substance down, and the daily loss in weight.  There was nothing none of us could do to make things better or more comfortable for her.  Although the diagnosis of ulcers gave Lauren some sense of relief, there was still something triggering her gag reflex.  

 

A week after the endoscopy, the situation with Lauren’s vomiting continued to worsen to the point where I felt the need for her to visit the emergency room at Los Alamitos Medical Center.  We sat in the waiting room for about three hours before a room became available.  The ER nurse requested multiple tests including, a chest MRI with and without contrast, an EKG, an ultrasound of the stomach, and probably the largest blood panel I have ever seen requested. What frustrated me, and Lauren, was that everything came back normal apart from her being slightly dehydrated.  What the hell is going on with her then?  After the dust settled, we left the hospital after being there for almost 8 hours.

 

We thought we were in good hands with the first gastroenterologist, she was very receptive, very caring, then nothing.  It was like she fell off the face of the planet.  No follow up calls, appointments, etc.  We were in dire need of a new GI doctor, but no one would have been able to see us for at least a month or two.  We needed help as Lauren’s surgery date was closing in fast.  During one of the visits with Dr. Vandermolen, Lauren could sense his frustration with the inactivity and the lack of urgency from the GI doctor.  Dr. Vandermolen stepped up to the plate and reached out to his colleagues to get Lauren an appointment with a different GI doctor.  The following day, Lauren had a phone consultation with Dr. Quist who carefully explained the next steps moving forward.  Dr. Quist put in an order for Lauren to have a feeding tube installed at Hoag Hospital in Newport.  This was on our anniversary, Thursday, November 3.  We tend to celebrate our anniversary in the strangest ways sometimes. LOL

 

The procedure to to have her feeding tube surgically installed took no longer than 15 minutes, however the time for her to come out of anesthesia was about 45 minutes give or take.  While I was waiting with Lauren in her room, Dr. Quist mentioned to me that Lauren’s stomach and esophagus was covered in ulcers, and it was much worse than he had expected.  Dr. Quist also performed a biopsy of an ulcer, not to check for cancer, but to see if there were any other issues that someone may have missed.  The anesthesiologist and Dr. Quist felt that it was necessary for Lauren to stay overnight at the hospital so she can be monitored with the hopes of being discharged the following day, Friday, November 4.  Keeping in mind, that November 7 is Lauren’s scheduled surgery day, and things quickly began to feel as if the surgery was going to be pushed out.

 

Friday, November 4 comes around, and the internal medicine doctor at Hoag, along with Dr. Quist ultimately decided that Lauren should just stay at the hospital to ensure she has enough strength and the meds to get her through surgery.  The next few days at the hospital was tiring, and stressful.  In the evening of Sunday, November 6, the doctors, the surgeons, the nurses all made the call to proceed with surgery.  Talk about waiting to to the last minute. Lauren’s surgery was scheduled for 7:30 AM, so that morning I wake up early and haul ass (within the legal speed limit of course) to Hoag to be at Lauren’s bedside by 5:00 AM.  We are waiting for the next steps when at 6:30, Dr. Vandermolen comes into Lauren’s room to check in on her.  He has been an absolute saint and seeing him that morning gave us both a sense of calm and comfort knowing that things are going to be just fine.  Eventually, the nurses come get Lauren at around 7:00 AM to take her to get prepped for surgery, and off she goes.

 

I am in the waiting room with Lauren’s mom, and bear with me, I’m trying to remember the timing, but I believe it was around 9:00 AM when Dr. Guerra, the breast surgeon, gave us an update on Lauren.  Dr. Guerra said her portion of the surgery went extremely well, no issues, and that two lymph nodes were removed to be tested for cancer cells.  By now, the reconstructive surgeon, Dr. Ng is doing her part to install expanders for the reconstructive portion of the surgery.  Give or take, it was about two hours later when Dr. Ng came into the waiting area to let me know that Lauren is in recovery and that everything went as planned with absolutely no issues.

 

I proceed back to Lauren’s room on the 8^th floor at Hoag when they finally wheel her back in at about 1 PM.  Lauren looks great, but I just can’t tell if she’s in any pain, hell, she doesn’t even know herself.  At this point I mentioned to her that while she was in surgery, I went out and bought my dream car, a Porsche 911 GT3 RS.  All I got was an “okay!”.  I couldn’t remember who asked Lauren if she was in pain, maybe it was a nurse, or maybe it was her mom, but Lauren said she was not.  I quickly responded that even though she might not be in pain, our checking account is.  I guess I was the only one that thought my joke was funny.  I really didn’t get my Porsche, but I am happy that my wife is back in the room.

 

Throughout the day, nurses and doctors visit Lauren to make sure she’s doing well and that she’s keeping up with her feeding through the tube, and to administer any medication to help with the pain.  While in the room, Lauren mentions to the nurse that she is in some pain and the nurses give a small dose of morphine.  Twice she was given morphine the day of surgery, but after that, the doctors, and nurses said Tylenol would be the first line of defense, and if that did not work, then it’s the oxycodone.  

 

By now it’s Tuesday the 8^th and Lauren gets a visit from Dr. Vandermolen super early in the morning, we are talking about 5:30 AM to check in on Lauren.  What an incredible guy and doctor for really caring for his patients.  Soon after, Dr. Ng, the plastic surgeon also checks in on Lauren to make sure she’s doing well and to ultimately give Hoag the green light for Lauren to be discharged.  At noon, Lauren finally gets to go home.

 

This is a whole new thing for us.  We now must navigate feeding Lauren through her feeding tube five times a day with a nutrient filled “shake” that is the size of a small protein shake using a large syringe.  We also must drain the fluid that accumulates from her mastectomy twice a day, sponge bath Lauren, clean the house, continue doing Laundry, feed our cat, play musical chairs with the cars to keep them running, drink wine, drink more wine, have more sips of said wine, and then find something that resembles breakfast, lunch, or dinner.  Most importantly, I am doing whatever I can to keep Lauren comfortable.  Initially we thought the idea of a care giver would be awesome, but they just seemed to get in the way, and they weren’t even allowed to feed Lauren.  After one day, we cancelled the service and things have been just fine.  Lauren is to the point now where she can feed herself without any issues.

 

There was one concern we ran into two days after surgery.  Lauren noticed that her left nipple became very dark in color compared to the right nipple.  I call Dr. Ng’s office at around 5:30 PM, thinking I was going to get the on-call doctor but was surprised when it was Dr. Ng who answered the phone.  We describe what is going on, she seems concerned, and she wants us to send her pictures.  Minutes after sending her pictures of both nipples, Dr. Ng calls us back and states that she is going to call Hoag’s hyperbaric treatment center for oxygen treatment.  The following morning, Hoag calls Lauren and states that she has an appoint later in the afternoon.  We have no idea what the process is like, but I have heard that it does some amazing things for recovery.  Hoag prescribed 4 weeks of treatment, 5 days a week and each session is two hours long.  It’s remarkable that even on the first day of treatment, we started seeing positive results.

 

Sit back, relax, and enjoy the oxygen.

We are adjusting to our new routines, but I can truly say that even though we have many things we must do throughout the day for Lauren post-surgery, what really helped get the load off our shoulder was when Dr. Guerra texted Lauren indicating that there were no residual cancer cells within the removed breast tissue.  As I had mentioned in our last Instagram post, Lauren is officially cancer free.  

November 14, Lauren has a follow up visit with Dr. Vandermolen to go over any post-surgery notes from the GI doctor who installed Lauren’s feeding tube as well as any biopsy post-surgical notes from the surgeons.  Being that the chemotherapy was extremely successful, as was the surgery and the positive biopsy results from the surgeon, Dr. Vandermolen indicated that Lauren will be in the cohort of cancer survivors whose likelihood of cancer coming back is extremely extremely low.

 

We are of course super pleased with the results of everything thus far.  Every test and each surgery have resulted in positive outcomes/answers, exactly what we needed to help ease our minds and move forward.  As of today, Lauren is doing good, she’s not in any pain, hasn’t thrown up in 10 days, remains positive and happy with the outcomes of everything.  She’s been taking it easy, trying to navigate introducing food back into her diet and getting used to her new, but temporary, body.  Thank you to everyone for the outpouring of support, we are looking forward to a new year so we can put this behind us.  

 

Love,

Chris

 

Look at all that hair.  Can you tell she likes cats? 

P.S. One thing we forgot to mention, we had a very successful Breast Cancer walk on October 23.  Close to 50 people showed up to support Team Lolo and we are so grateful to everyone who came out and missed those that couldn’t make it.  Thank you for supporting, Lauren didn’t stop smiling the whole walk!